Thursday, July 9, 2015

Adoption Testimony

I am applying for lots of grants and almost all of them ask for our 'adoption testimony', or what has led us to adopt.  I thought I'd share my answer here.





Daniel and I always knew they wanted many children.  Daniel came from a big family and loved the dynamics of that.  I only had one sister and always wished for more siblings growing up. 

When I was in graduate school for her degree in speech-language pathology, I interned at a skilled nursing and therapy center called Special Kids.  After graduation, I was hired there.  One of my first clients was a little girl adopted from China with significant delays.  I fell in love!  My boss also had adopted a little girl from China after doing missionary work there for a year.  I had never considered adoption as a means to grow their family until meeting these people who had adopted and loving their children.

Then, Daniel’s cousin adopted a little girl from Taiwan.  Seeing them go thru the process successfully and the obvious joy the little girl brought to their family made us start to talk about adoption.  After our second son was born, we decided to start the adoption process from Taiwan, thru the same organization that Daniel’s cousin used.  It was clear very fast that God was not leading us to Taiwan.  Doors slammed shut everywhere we looked until Congo. 

The Democratic Republic of Congo in Africa was where we felt God’s leading.  An amazing organization that usually only takes on families known personally by past clients or thru the founder’s church, decided to take on Daniel and I despite never meeting us.  It was an amazing set of circumstances when they found out they were only second on the list for a referral for an infant girl (0-12 months old).  In January of 2013, 7 months after initially signing on with Our Family in Africa, we accepted the referral of a beautiful, but tiny 12 day old baby girl. We decided to name her Selah Grace. (Her Congolese name is Ndjoka Therese).

Things with Selah moved smoothly.  We were expecting to have her home by the summer of 2013.  However, things began to slow down dramatically at the Embassy in Kinshasa, DRC and it was taking much longer to get visas.  We were thrilled, however, when they received the adoption judgment in June 2013 and Selah was officially our daughter! 

However, in September 2013 the Congolese government suddenly and unexpectedly imposed a suspension on the issuance of exit letters.  The exit letter is the last thing needed to leave the country with your child. 

It has been 22 months since the suspension was put in place and we still don’t have Selah home.  Since that time, God had blessed us with a baby girl thru birth we named Emma.  She is now 1 year old.   Selah is still stuck in Congo and is over 2 years old now.  She is healthy and doing well and we give thanks for that every day. 

Thru the process of waiting for Selah, we knew God was stretching us.  He was teaching us lessons on waiting, perseverance, and that anything worth having is hard.  We began to focus more on Selah and the children waiting rather than their dream to adopt a young baby.  We began to realize that no adoption is a non special needs adoption.  All children come home with some sort of special needs.  The things that used to scare them, such as disabilities, didn’t seem so scary anymore.  After all, it’s not about us as parents but about the children.  It’s about giving a child a home that needs one. And knowing it will be messy and hard.

Daniel and I had always wanted to adopt but after the hardships and feeling completely emotionally drained, we didn’t know if they would ever adopt internationally again. 

One night, I found a little girl on rainbow kids, an adoption photolisting.  She was nearly 3 years old and had down syndrome.  I remembered my time at Special Kids and how she always had a special place in my heart for children with down syndrome.  This little girl was in China and Daniel and I didn’t meet the requirements.  However, I kept feeling drawn to the little girl’s picture.

Then, in January of 2015, China changed some requirements for the better!  We suddenly qualified where we didn’t before.  Then, once again, I saw a little girl on the photolisting that I felt drawn to.  Since we now qualified, she decided to inquire about her.  The file was sent and I was amazed! When looking at all the pictures, I discovered it was the same little girl from months ago!  This agency was just using a different picture for the photolisting!

Daniel and I spent much time in prayer and research.  We both felt drawn to this little girl.  Finally, the agency sent a couple of videos and when we saw the sweet girl in China smiling at the camera, we both broke down in tears.  We knew she was our daughter.  We made it official with the agency on the little girls 3rd birthday.  We have decided to name her Haven Joy.

Daniel and I always knew we wanted a big family and love that God is in charge with how big that family will be!  Now when we say we are called to adopt, we know that the calling may not come when we think is best, but when God knows is best.  We are still fighting to bring Selah home and now starting the process to bring Haven home as well. 

God has used the wait and struggle for Selah to mold Daniel and I so they would be ready to say ‘yes’ to another little girl in China.  God uses hard, impossible things to bring glory to Him.  What started off as a journey to bring home a healthy baby girl has resulted in striving to bring home a toddler from Africa and a toddler with a lifelong special need from China. 

And that is the perfect story after all.
 
 

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